Tuesday, July 29, 2008

its official...

I am a big sap. What else would you call someone tearing up over reading this:

Sonnet XVII
Pablo Neruda

I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz,
or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.
I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul.
I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
so I love you because I know no other way

than this: where I does not exist, nor you,
so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.

The last four lines just, ah, just kills me. Were that someone would read that to me; read to me and mean it, really, really mean it. Well, one can dream right?

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

here comes the rain again (or welcome to the tropics)

Have I ever mentioned that I love the rain? I find something rather soothing about it that catches my whimsy. Watching the rain fall and listening to its steady cadence seems calming somehow. And walking in the haze of a soft drizzle ( without an umbrella most of the time) evokes something oddly romantic to me. I also love the fury of a storm, all flash and thunder, the roiling winds, and the tap tap tapping of water pelting down from the heavens. It is in these times that I feel as though all the dark and fierce emotions inside my head are mirrored by the elements outside, as though everything I feel but cannot express are out there, hashed out by nature's display. I love it especially on days when I find myself in a weird mood, then the fury outside calms the tempest inside. But as much as I love nature's tempestuous show, I also love the calm after the furor passes, of looking out of windows washed clean by the torrents, of the sun breaking through the clouds, as though the world has been wiped clean, literally and figuratively, and starting again, on a clean slate, is somehow possible.

( I got caught in heavy rains this morning, and aside from getting totally and utterly drenched, I also had to wade through the flooded streets of the Metro. Still, I love the rain, hence this post)